SO I ASKED MYSELF,

"IF YOU REALLY WANT THAT, WHY ARE YOU DOING NOTHING?"

BECAUSE I'M SCARED.

BECAUSE THE CHANGE IS BEYOND MY IMAGINATION.

BECAUSE I'M JUST A SCRAWNY THIRTEEN-YEAR-OLD, AND I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO.

BECAUSE I'M JUST A SCRAWNY THIRTEEN-YEAR-OLD, AND IT IS NOT HARD TO BRUISE ME.

BECAUSE I'M TOO LAZY.

'BECAUSE SOMEONE BETTER WILL TAKE THAT PLACE, SO WHAT'S THE POINT?'

---

A ha ha, fail post. This wasn't what I was trying to say. And I didn't mean to exaggerate so much.

With a Heart Wide Open

Take all of your wasted honor
Every little past frustration
Take all of your so-called problems,
Better put 'em in quotations

Say what you need to say
Say what you need to say

Walking like a one man army
Fighting with the shadows in your head
Living out the same old moment
Knowing you'd be better off instead,
If you could only . . .

Say what you need to say
Say what you need to say

Have no fear for giving in
Have no fear for giving over
You'd better know that in the end
Its better to say too much
Then never say what you need to say again

Even if your hands are shaking
And your faith is broken
Even as your eyes are closing
Do it with a heart wide open

Say what you need to say
Say what you need to say
Say what you need to say
Say what you need to say

---
Say by John Mayer

Lol, out of all the other heartfelt songs there are...
idk.

OMG FIRST WEEK OF SCHOOL YAY.

Well, it certainly passed very...

Slowly.

No matter. After spending 5 days in the hospital right after arriving in this sandbox, meeting friends is a real treat. Congrats, Ocha, for wearing the hijab (full-time?) :'D. God must be proud of you. I, on the other hand, am still waiting for my heart to be willing. Don't know when that will be, but I'll get there, insyaallah. -A-;;

I had... 6 BLOOD TESTS IN TOTAL (well, around 7 or 8 if you count the times where the needle failed to draw blood) one day after the other. But those ant bites were nothing; what killed me were the IVs. O__o They were like SCORPION STINGS--not that I've ever been bitten by those babies before. So the doctor took blood tests because mom was afraid that my trombosis (or however you spell it) levels are okay, because if they dropped fast, that might mean i have DEMAM BERDARAH (dengue fevaaaah). Well, it was okay, except that...

THE VIRUS THAT ATTACKED ME KILLED UP MY WHITE BLOOD CELLS AND GAVE ME A MASSIVE FEVER and I had slight anaemia, so i was given these horrible iron syrups which tasted fine at first, but then as i drank them more, it tasted more like blood itself.

And the doctor kept me in the hospital because i might get infected and i will not be able to fight diseases well because of my deceased white blood cells, lol.

Alright. School.

Now our tutor group's name is cool, thats one. :D 910, or 9TEN to be proper. Then they had these neat shades and new teachers, which some students find highly attractive. Whether I'm one of these students or not, I say nothing.

And I know this is quite late, but do allow me to welcome Zulfikar Fathoni (FIKARHE) into QIS. And other new students, of course. :'D Hope you guys cope well.

Well, I feel intimidated by some teachers (MISTERMATHCOPLEY), that is probably only my worry for the week. And the fact that I feel INCOMPLETE, though I don't know why such a 'godforsaken' feeling overcomes me that much (mareesha doesnt read this blog, but i loved the way she used that term in english).

PE nearly had me barfing. I loved it and all, but I'm not fit enough for it. And we only had to dig in volleyball. I hate that about me. I don't know, my anaemia was acting up, or I was seriously out of oxygen levels. And I sort of self-promised this year, I'll make improvements in my physical status. Oh, nadhira (she wont read this), why can't I have the same stamina as you have. And you, too, Sharinia. I feel miles away from becoming like my football heroes (which is truthfully the second purpose on why i must excel in physical challenges -_-).

Nothing deep and heartfelt I want to transfer across in this post. I just want to add, 'OMG SRSLY, QIS HAS ITS OWN GLEE CLUB??!!11!' and keep the world spinning with love, life and laffterr. ((:

Alright bainao.

WELL I FOUND MY INNER-GLEEK.

I CAN'T UPLOAD PICTURES HERE, but you know those pictures you see around? With the word 'GEE' and a hand with fingers making an 'L' shape, so it would be gLee? Yep, that's the one.

I can't ramble much here because it would be uninteresting, but I find the series interesting. Created by Ryan Murphy, the musical series is about a teacher who has hopes in reviving the 'Glee' Club and send it to the regionals.

In the beginning, there were six people on board; Finn, the quarterback and a nice and talented guy. Rachel, the female protagonist who wants to be a star in the future. Smart and independent, she has a bit of feelings for Finn. Kurt (my favourite xD ), a fashionable soprano who admitted he was gay; Artie, a geeky guitarist on wheelchairs; Mercedes, preppy and outgoing, and Tina, the bashful Asian girl.

Lol, I don't feel like putting writing powers to this. Ah, it's just nice and funny to watch. I don't care if Kurt is gay, he's interesting to me. And I suppose that's what the show is trying to stop; stereotypical views.

Finn, a quarterback, is dating Quinn, the mean cheerleader. That's one example of stereotype that the show is trying to stop by [SPOILERS] making him like Rachel back. And how the football team is too macho to dance? Kurt and Finn stopped that. A couple of guys from the team joined Glee club (including the very stubborn and homophobic Puck), and vice versa. Well, break the stereotypes. Have a quarterback defend a gay boy who is very much in love with him. Have the whole football team dance to 'Ring On It' in the middle of a game. Like what Sue Sylvester (the very sarcastic cheerleader coach who was very determined to bring down Glee) said, "Get out of your box, even if the box is only your home."

idk what I'm trying to say. Was I trying to say that glee is awesome? Or Kurt is so far my bias for now? Or stop thinking stereotypically?

Ah. This was boring. But I love glee anyway.

Bought 2 albums of their music. whee. :))

A Little Note of Red and White

Gee, 65 years already. :)

I suppose this is one of the things I like about my country. Firstly, born in a place where there are lots of corruptions and terrorists and explosives (LPGs, daang), sometimes, the atmosphere is rather down. But Indonesia offers many things. Like its nature. Its cultures. Traditions. History. Its skies.

Wait, I'm also confused about how this connects. Well, we have all these things, and we're proud anyway to call it Indonesia's. Indonesia's nature, culture, traditions, history, and skies. Not the Dutch's. Not the Japanese's.

And we couldn't have called it Indonesia if not for our strength. We are one of those countries who managed to break out of our not-so-comfort zone, and we fought for it. We stopped being pushed around by the Dutch, and we took a stand against the Japanese, and maybe some other countries who decided, 'Hey, let's dominate that country, because I love the weather there!'

And our reply would be, 'You know what? We won't live like this. It's time to move up and say that this is our land. Our home. Not yours.' (Well, imagine there were other countries.)

So thank you Soekarno and Hatta, and the others who fought for our freedom. Like Washington to America, I see them as the fathers of our country. Rip the blue from the flag, and leave the red and white for us. This was what we wanted.

17/08/45

'Unity in diversity.' - Indonesian motto.

And Ramadhan Kareem!